The Lesson from the Grocery

I was at the grocery the other day, the local Lowe's -- we call it "Girls" Lowe's to distinguish it from "Boys" Lowe's, the hardware chain of the same name (the two chains are unrelated).  I was wandering around the produce section when I turned near the apples and just missed bumping into another gentleman coming from the opposite direction.

We didn't collide, but were close to what would have been a minor bump.  We then looked at each other, smiled, chuckled and went our respective ways.

As I was walking away, I thought about it.  I'm 67 years old, and the other fellow was probably of comparable age.  Our reaction, both of us, was to smile, laugh, excuse ourselves and go our separate ways.

What it was not, was to snarl at the other one, kick his grocery cart or his leg, cuss him out or do some other inane, obnoxious macho gesture to assert our superiority, as people 40-50 years younger than we would likely have done.  There was no "What the &#$% you doing, fool?", as we can readily picture from a couple puffed-up 2018 young men.

That's what occurred to me right away -- that, as the saying goes when properly cleaned up, "stuff happens", and accidental collisions (or, in this case, non-collisions) are "stuff" that happens.  No blame, no harm, no foul, and certainly no need for a confrontation.

I thought "Why can't young people, particularly males but really everyone, react to accidents like that with a laugh?".  Why, it occurred to me, must every little thing be considered an affront to our masculinity, our a sign of disrespect, when they can be defused with a smile and a chuckle?

I suppose that a video of our encounter should be mandatory watching for every 14-year-old kid, not that we did anything special -- the other guy probably has already forgotten it -- but that a smile should be the default posture.

So I think.

Copyright 2018 by Robert Sutton
Like what you read here?  There's a new post from Bob at www.uberthoughtsUSA.com at 10am Eastern time, every weekday, giving new meaning to "prolific essayist."  Appearance, advertising, sponsorship and interview inquiries cheerfully welcomed at bsutton@alum.mit.edu or on Twitter at @rmosutton